So Tuesday night I was really struggling with a problem. It had been bugging me for a while because it was something to do with my own self respect.
Anyways so Tuesday nights I have dinner with my dad (something we started to better our relationship haha)
So he was going on about something but I was really distracted by what was bugging me that I just had to speak up and decided to tell him.
Do you ever notice that sometimes the best advice comes from the weirdest of people? haha
Funny enough I learned that my dad is actually a lot like me when it comes to how we react to people and deal with issues.
We both have a hard time saying no to people because we both don't like to hurt anybody. Obviously, if you know my dad's history LOL and if you know mine, then it has a lot of rebounds and sometimes what we intend not to happen, ends up happening lol.
This isn't one of those cases though. In fact this is a case of me realizing I've been under treated and not knowing how to go about it.
One thing that he taught me is that no matter what decision I make, whatever I choose to do to handle a situation, I cannot feel guilty about it afterwards.
Theres no right or wrong way of handling things you can only do what's best for you. Plus, the choices you make, well they make sense to you right now. So in the future if you realize that, ok maybe I shouldn't of blocked this person out or maybe I shouldn't of raised my voice, theres no point feeling mad at yourself for it. Theres nothing you can do to change the choice you already made.
Excepting and moving forward has got to be your top priority.
A lot of people have had a hard time understanding me for that reason. For the reason that I forgive and move forward easily (Some people even take advantage of me because of it lol)
I do it mainly because once I fully understand a situation and fully understand how I feel, I don't focus on what he/she did anymore. I focus on 'What can I do now to better my life?' If people aren't willing to drop their egos and want to better themselves as well, then unfortunately a lot of the time, I leave them behind. I just don't have room in my brain for such negativity and sadness. When I'm surrounded by it, it hits me hard and therefore I do whatever I can to not put myself in situations that are negative.
I love to love not to hate. I'm not a fighter. I will fight for myself when I need to but otherwise I guess i figure that those that really love me, will come around and will know when they have under estimated me. But when they do under estimate me, I naturally block them out. One of my fav sayings that I live by is "Do unto others as you expect them to do unto you" Treat me with love and respect, and you will get it back. In fact you would probably get smothered in it. That's what gets me into stupid situations like the one I'm in now. Too much love.
But a lot of the time it's out of fear. Something I'm working on lol
Anyways I hope yall are having a fabulous week. Theres a light at the end of every tunnel. Sometimes it may be so faint and sometimes you may not even see it at all. What matters is that you keep believing it's there. Eventually you will find it.
xoxo
Ps. New MARY episode! Please watch! MUAH xo
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